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about

These are songs that we made with our brains and some instruments in our home studio, at home!

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released November 16, 2015

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Sage and Jared's Happy Gland Band Albuquerque, New Mexico

Sage and Jared’s Happy Gland Band is a band of whimsy and unbridled glandulosity. It’s a band that will make you reconsider how grossed out you are about the endocrine system. Sage plays ukulele. Jared plays upright bass. Their glistening songs of mundanity, desecration, celebration, and perspiration appear on their CD, Flooded Away. ... more

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Track Name: Long Long Walk
Let's take a long, long walk
Along the ditch and talk
We'll lose ourselves in time
And eventually wind up
Right back where we started
Together, singing, open-hearted

Let's take a long, long look
At this garden bursting
With gifts we're freely given
Given care and cultivation
We'll get right back where we started
With our friends all open-hearted

Let's take a long, long walk
Along the bosque trail
Feel the river, steady flowing
And the cottonwood trees growing
We'll get right back where we started
Together, singing, open-hearted
Track Name: Fallen in the Sun
When the earth has fallen in the sun
When frogs don't croak and hummingbirds don't hum
When no one's there to water burning lawns
And ugly ducklings don't turn into swans

When junebugs cease to cling to backdoor screens
And golfers cease to putt on putting greens
When monkeys nevermore swing from their tails
And whalers nevermore shall harpoon whales

The whalers and the sailors turn to steam
The tailors never stitch another seam
Snowflakes never more again shall fall
But I'll still love you darling most of all

When the earth has been reduced to ash
And no one watches episodes of M*A*S*H
When watermelons nevermore shall grow
And city streets with molten lava flow

When it's time for everything to die
From cockroaches to hippopatami
I won't be afraid and I won't cry
As long as I have you right by my side

I won't be afraid and I won't scream
As long as you are right there next to me
Track Name: The Clever Wife
While you're laughing I am dreaming
At a most relaxed pace
Swinging gently in our hammock
Making crowns of Queen Anne's lace

Should you kiss me I will kiss you
For I've been dreaming of the day
That we'll live together
And things will go this way

Reading the paper
Eating fried eggs with toast
You're the one that I love the most
You're the one that I love the most

Mixing martinis
Being the world's best host
You're the one that I love the most
You're the one that I love the most

As you waken I stand by our bed
Bearing breakfast trays
Coffee, orange juice, buttered toast
Cream, jam, and two poached eggs

While you're working, I am cleaning
Dusting baseboards, also basting
Tender pork ribs in the oven
Just for you to enjoy tasting

Juicing the oranges
Frying up the french toast
You're the one that I love the most
You're the one that I love the most

Peeling potatoes
Roasting a big pot roast
You're the one that I love the most
You're the one that I love the most

Betty Crocker says the clever wife
Always keeps her cool
She has an apron that she sewed herself
That makes her husband drool

Reading the paper
Eating fried eggs with toast
You're the one that I love the most
You're the one that I love the most
Track Name: The Souls of Unfinished Songs
A plague of red-eyed gnats
Comes down upon me
Drinks the tears from my eyes
Sip, sip, sip
Tiny feet upon my skin
The rush of wings in the air
All hope is gone
For the souls of those unfinished songs

The wings of a hundred bats
Bring in darkness and strife
Whipping up what I’d tamp down
Cruel, dark, cold
The ravens come on the wing
From their perch of despair
All hope is gone
For the souls of those unfinished songs

They hover around my ears
Black wings beating
Draining all hope from my heart
Wishing they’d take to the sky
I wish them away
But can’t let them go
The souls of those unfinished songs
Track Name: One Star Review
You wrote us a one star review,
But can't you see how much we love you
You came in for Supper on a really busy night
And we didn't do things quite right

So we wrote you a letter
To tell you we'd do better
We'll make you up a juicy burger 
And season perfectly your waffle fries so you could

Take back your one star review
Vero P. can't you see how much we love you
If you'd just told us in person what we had done wrong
We'd have given you a bucket of Moon Bombs

Instead you wrote us a one star review
Before you could try the Shrimp and Grits or Fried Pickle Chips
You logged onto Yelp with firey vitriol
Telling the web we're a waste, which is sad

We're sorry we let you down
We hate to see you frown
But don't let us drown in our tears because

You wrote us a one star review
Vero P., can't you see how much we love you

Dear Vero P.
Have a Fried Chicken Banh Mi on me
We've tried to reconcile
We'll go the extra mile because we love you
In spite of your one star review
Track Name: Dead Sloth
Let's go to the park soon
It's gonna get dark soon
We're gonna find you a dead sloth